Open Question: Real Criticism On My Lyrics(if you know ANYTHING about writing)!!?

i just want real criticism this a rap
i want criticism on my pattern technique if it flows in your head, my rhyme scheme anything i just wanna know what im workin with,read it outloud if itll work better, i dont care, i appreciate it, isaac

yo
her skintone complexion
a reflection
of coffee with 2 creamers
she caught me with an erection
it started with sex-un…..safe with no protection
for weeks
then we both got caught in the wrong direction
of tryna be in love
we loved livin together
never thought wed end up sick of eachother
broke up and i dipped out
now we missin eachother
then i got kicked out
now shes pissed
shit its whatever
life sucks and yup
she found somebody else to fuck
but, im still in lust with this chick shit im stuck
shit im fucked
cause all i really wanted was a life but i got caught and thought that all i wanted was a wife
really ladies i don’t mean to intentionally diss you
but why do you treat us like shit when were affectionately with you?
lol dont worry bout it Dylan, I appreciate any opinion i can get, negative positive or in between. I do appreciate it,
isaac
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